sundog

September 30, 2007

Lights and Sounds

Filed under: Happy, Home, My Life — happychick @ 6.38p09

Life makes fools out of us all. While we rush around, trying to get ahead, trying to achieve success and make something out of ourselves, trying to… well, I believe the saying is “live life to the fullest”. The irony is, however, that no matter what choices we make and what paths we take, life goes on around us regardless. When we mourn those who have gone, the whole world goes on without them. When we make a bad decision the sun still shines. Life is a trap- we’re led to believe that each one of us is the most important person in our lives, but there is so much more out there. It’s reassuring, in a way. I am but one person in a world of billions. I am one girl. Whether or not I wake up tomorrow matters to very few, in the grand scheme of things. It makes me feel small, sure- but I know that whatever mistakes I make from here on in are insignificant in the long run.

Tomorrow I’ll wake up 16 years old. That’s legal over here- legal to attain a license, legal to have sex… Not that I’ll be jumping into bed with anyone anytime soon. I don’t suppose it’ll be all that different. “Same shit different year”, as my mother would say. But it gives you extra credit, all the same. The older you are, the more respect people give you (providing you deserve it in the first place). These are supposed to be the most exciting years of my life. And they are, but not in the way I was expecting as a kid- I’d always wished and wished to be 16. They were so independent. They were free. They got to go out and go drinking and partying with boys… being 16 meant having the world at your feet. You were no longer controlled by your paretns- and school? Pfft! I could get along just fine without school. 16 meant adventures. It meant fun and danger and boy- particularly boys. Golly. Was I naïve, or was I naïve?

Fuck I love this room. Granted, it’s a bit messy atm, but if I could be anywhere in the world right now, it would be here, in this room. It’s probably the second-best bedroom I’ve ever had- and that’s saying something. I’ve had about 7. It’s a relatively big room. It’s always warm. There are perhaps one too many Orlando Bloom posters covering the walls, and the view from the window is of the neighbor’s bathroom, but it’s lovely all the same. There are a lot of fairies on the chest of drawers, on the walls, on the shelves… and books. LOADS of books. From here I can see the Harry Potter set, a couple of chick-lit dramas (ok, a LOT of chick-lit dramas), Macbeth, The Handmaids Tale, Anne of Green Gables… Yes, I couldn’t live without my books.

I haven’t got s lot else to say. I should be going to bed. It’s my birthday tomorrow, after all. Until then, I leave you. J x x

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1 Comment »

  1. Since you typed that life makes fools out of all of us, that makes you a fool. And I don’t wish you a happy birthday.

    Comment by Anonymous — March 18, 2011 @ 6.38p03


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