I have two chihuahuas- Ellie and Max. When Ellei has pups we send them to friends of ours, who sell them and send us the proceeds. In a way, we're kinda like breeders…
Anyway, as I look into my loungeroom, I can see Ellie, who is very pregnant at the moment(due any day now), preening herself with her front paws… And Max, who's a bit of a retard(in the nicest way), trying to eat his own leg. It's pretty cute.
The reason I say this is because, when anyone asks what type of dogs I have, and when I reply "chihuahuas", their immediate reaction is to screw their faces up in disgust, like they have stepped in horse manure.
"Aren't they ratty-looking things?"
"Gross, they have huge eyes, right?"
etc,etc. Everyone has somehow got the impression that they are hairless little ratty yap-yap dogs. And it annoys me. Especially when they see the dogs and say
"Aaaw, they're so cute!"
"Not at all what I expected"
Well of course they're not, you moron! Dogs are like people- some are ugly, some are not. How would they like it if I said, "Gross, you have a grandma? Does she have a beard?" Well, they would not like it. But you see, I wouldn't say that, because
a} I am not rude
b} I am not an idiot, and I know that not all grandma's have beards, and that there is every chance that their grandma is thouroughly beard-less.
So you see, I get offended when people judge my dogs before meeting them. And I have but one thing to say to those people-
Screw you, Chihuahua Haters! (and fuck you in the neck with a butterknife)
Ahahahahah! That is the sort of response I wish I could come up with for people who piss me off. I particularly like how the more aggeressive part of the response is tossed in as a casual aside! Love your work!
Comment by Mr Angry — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
You, sir, sir no better than the people who piss you off.
Comment by Anonymous — May 30, 2015 @ 6.38p05
Jesus fucking christ you shit eating moron! Is your life so fucking dead this is what you do? Troll 9 year old internet comments? Get a life you fucking loser.
Comment by Mr Angry — May 31, 2015 @ 6.38p05
What a big baby you are, Mr Angry. If you can’t handle people typing shit to you, then fuckin’ respond.
Comment by Anonymous — June 12, 2015 @ 6.38p06
Now I would say that this will make it official….you are a member of the fam! There is a hairy little Chihuahua running around our house. Her name is Imbri. Yapper, yes. Bug eyed yes. But she loves us and looks like she is staying since she’s 4 years old.
Comment by Sandra — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
Ah, Mr. Angry…. thankyou. Btw, I stole the “fuck you in the neck with…” from Sandra and co. x
Comment by happychick — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
cna i have one of yer puppies, when they arrived. i wanna screw it :-p
Comment by hellboy — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
How dare you post that, sicko! because of what you posted, you ought to get mental help.
Comment by Anonymous — May 29, 2015 @ 6.38p05
I’m going to pretend that I never read that… Oh, I get it! SCREW you….. ah- that took me a moent. I think I hurt my brain…. xx
Comment by happychick — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
And btw…there are some good things about being older. For some magical reason, the hair stops growing on your legs. I think it so a woman will have more time to tend her newly acquired facial hair. 😀
Comment by Sandra — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
What do you mean, newly aquired?! Have you forgotten already about my lip-waxing incident? Because I havnt! x
Comment by happychick — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
pretending not to see me?! 0k im gonna screw myself, sorry hurting yer puppy!
Comment by Hell Boy — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
You kids are sooooo funny. Yes as a matter of fact, I did forget the “my lips are sealed” incident. It only gets worse from here on out!
Comment by jcoftw — April 26, 2006 @ 6.38p04
[…] Morally reprehensible: This requires no explanation. If you think the act of nuking Iran is not morally reprehensible, well, to borrow a phrase I read recently on another blog: fuck you in the neck with a butter knife. […]
Pingback by Angry 365 Days a Year » Blog Archive » “I Hear the Voices…” — April 27, 2006 @ 6.38p04
I have a Chihuahua and I love her. I experience the same thing when I tell people about her, but honestly, she is the best dog I have ever had.
Comment by mike — June 4, 2006 @ 6.38p06
this is enjoyable. http://www.brhodeisland.com
Comment by yeend — June 24, 2006 @ 6.38p06
dogs rule if you hate dogs youre crazy!
Comment by Anonymous — March 24, 2008 @ 6.38p03
I’m with you on that.
Comment by Anonymous — May 29, 2015 @ 6.38p05
Chihuahua haters, get lots!
Comment by Anonymous — December 25, 2009 @ 6.38p12
Thumbs up to all of you who are against dog haters.
Comment by Anonymous — April 26, 2010 @ 6.38p04
Screw dog haters 🙂
Comment by Anonymous — July 21, 2011 @ 6.38p07
I second that.
Comment by Anonymous — May 16, 2014 @ 6.38p05
dog haters are bitches.Screw dem all ;D And chihuahuas r amazing dogs and you don’t know it cuz perhaps ur jealous?They get special treatment and they sleep all day and bathroom everywhere (: Jeallouss?I know don’t lie.
Comment by ♥Annie♥ — July 21, 2011 @ 6.38p07
You tell ’em, ma’am!
Comment by Anonymous — May 16, 2014 @ 6.38p05